I’ve seen many articles, books and blog posts about the importance of unconditionally loving oneself. And most of us agree that learning to truly love yourself is vitally important. Being able to love yourself provides the foundation for loving everyone else. Self-love provides a foundation for loving, accepting and forgiving others. It helps us set healthy boundaries and work toward worthy goals. It helps us stand up for ourselves, and others. Being able to love yourself can be the crucial difference between settling for ho-hum work or relationships and living your dreams without limitations.
And, it can serve as a basis for teaching others how to treat us.
But what does unconditionally loving yourself really mean?
I ask myself —
“What would it really look like, feel like, and sound like if I had absolute, 100%, no-kidding, radically unconditional love for myself?”
I’ve been having many moments recently in my meditations, and in my “real” walking-around life, when the thought comes into my mind that:
Nothing Else Matters.
And it’s awesome!
When I am so completely absorbed in the moment, when I am loving what I am doing, when I am 100% appreciating something in my life, when I am really truly grateful; and when I am truly accepting and embracing my absolute ideal desires and purpose (no matter how preposterous sounding), a voice pops into my head and says:
Nothing Else Matters.
How cool is that?
I find this thought popping into my brain more and more often recently and it all started when I made the decision to fully embrace my absolutely outrageous ideal. My truly preposterous real ideal.
Like no kidding, fully 100% embrace that little voice saying what my absolute ideal way of living on the planet would be. If I was absolutely doing my ideal work, living my ideal life, with no thought about what was “realistic” or made any sense to anyone — then nothing else matters!
It’s taken me years to allow myself to think bigger and bigger in some areas of my life.
It’s taken decades to be able to widen my comfort zone of beliefs, to include more and more unbelievable things.
And I’ve been far from where I want to be.
My aim is to get to the point when I can truly say:
Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.
(So much wisdom in Alice’s Adventures!)
And yet, I’ve still been so far from my true ideal.
I’ve embraced my ideal… to an extent. Which is not really embracing it at all.
Why? Because at some level my actual true ideal, the one buried deep down inside that I’ve been shown glimpses of through the years, has still, to my subconscious and even my conscious, seemed preposterous.
Until studying Haanel’s Master Key this week and meditating.
And I’ve been studying Haanel’s Master Key for a year and a half. (Ask me about the best way to get started.)
Please click link below to read my new blog post, and please feel free to leave comments under the post on my site (LivingToYourOwnBeat.com) I’d love to connect with you and get your feedback! (Again, leave comments after you click please) Also, I took a risk and included a poem I wrote. It’s at the end of the post…. Yikes!!! 😀
There is one quality which one must possess to win, and that is definiteness of purpose, the knowledge of what one wants, and a burning desire to possess it. — Napoleon Hill
A compelling vision with a clear purpose and a burning desire to make it happen can ignite a fire under you. It can keep you coming back to it and working toward it no matter what.
It compels you. It drives you. You want it so badly you can taste it. You cannot NOT work toward it.
It keeps you going when you are low on energy; when you don’t feel motivated.
It enables you to stay committed to your purpose after experiencing difficult challenges, obstacles, and even painful disappointments. It is
A BURNING DESIRE.
Notice I did not say a wish, a hope or even a dream.
A wish or a hope won’t compel you to move forward when fears and obstacles show up. A wish or a hope won’t even keep you moving when you’re tired, low on energy, or out of your comfort zone.
A vague dream won’t actually compel the persistence of action needed to make your dream a reality.
And a vague desire won’t push you through your fears, obstacles and setbacks — unless it becomes clear, rock-solid, based on your values, and backed by
A BURNING DESIRE.
And I don’t mean a luke-warm desire or even a hot desire. It must be a burning desire to compel you to take a leap of faith, dive headfirst into unknown territory, and to keep moving toward your purpose no matter what.
Will you risk taking a running leap over a deep canyon full of hot lava and slay a fire-breathing, three-headed armored dragon with giant Freddy Krueger claws for a warm wish?
That little clip is of “Radio Static Interference.”
I’ve been learning to treasure my mental space, my internal environment.
What do you do when you treasure something? You protect it. You give it priority.
I’ve done over 6 months of work to be in charge of my internal environment. I know how precious it is to respect and protect my mental space. It creates my mindset and my views and my way of thinking and my energy and impacts absolutely everything I do. My internal world creates my outer world, and my outer world reflects my inner.
“The world without is a reflection of the world within.”
When has protecting my inner world been more important than now?
It’s a challenging time for all of us. It’s more challenging for some than others, losing loved ones, working in health care, financial crises to name a few. For many of us, uncertainty is in every corner of our lives from our financial lives to our health to our loved ones and so much more.
And there are so many conflicting opinions out there in both social media and the traditional media.
There has never been more noise to get lost in as there is now!
It is so easy to get lost in an endless sea of opinions, judgements, fears, worries, theories and thoughts.
Most of all fears.
Whether the fears are about health, loved ones, finances, business, jobs, economy, our freedoms, or our social well-being and way of life.
However, NOW, more than ever, I see the importance of protecting my mental space.
We all decide for ourselves how much we want to take in. I want to be informed, so I take in some, and I research. However, I have to know when to stop. I have to know when listening to others is starting to cross a line into damaging the internal environment that I have intentionally created and continue to create.
I must have a STATIC ALERT.
I have a noise alert, a static alert, a muck alert, that I MUST pay attention to. I must not only pay attention to it, I must give it PRIORITY.
It’s not even a question. It is SO important. It is more important than ever that I develop a keen static alert that detects even low levels of static so that they don’t become the Static Interference in the video above.
That’s what I pay attention to.
“Interference” is the descriptor that is SO important here.
So much of what is out there on the news, in the media, in my conversations with friends and loved ones, on my facebook…
I don’t want to judge anyone’s opinions or thoughts or emotional processing, I just want to notice when it is interference in my own connection to Source.
My internal environment is SO PRECIOUS, SO IMPORTANT to my mental health, to creating my outer world and to my connection to Spirit.
I am not motivated to create, to add goodness to the world, to follow my inspiration and positive energy, when I am lost in fears, opinions, analyzation.
I have to stay attuned to my internal static alert and know when to turn off the outside noise, the interference. The interference with my connection to the best part of myself, the Universal Mind or God.
“Silence isn’t empty, it’s filled with answers.”
I must go into the silence even more now, even more that there is so much static, so much noise.
As I mentioned in an earlier post, “The more I clear my mind of negative thoughts, judgments, opinions, lingering emotions… the more I clear a path to access Source or Spirit, or Universal Mind or God.”
The Universal Mind, the divine, is accessed in the silence. When my conscious mind is quieted, this is when I connect with God or Universal Mind. The more I connect with Source, the more beauty, love, kindness and connection I create.
THAT will now be my connection, my link for the static. When my static alert goes off, when I start noticing that an internal line is being crossed and that the noise is interfering in my treasured internal space, I will think of beauty, love and kindness.
I will ask myself what beauty love and kindness I can create.
Maybe it is a loving gesture, a kindness or a compassion that I can put out. Maybe it is a compliment I can give. Maybe I can immediately act on an inspiration or an energy to work toward something that puts good into the world in some way. Maybe it is to work toward something that excites me. Maybe it is just a loving thought or a beautiful thought that I create within my mind.
Regardless what it is, when my static alert goes off, I will remove myself internally from the thoughts and fears that are interfering with my connection to Source and ask myself instead:
What beauty, love, or kindness can I create right now?
Feeling gratitude for healthcare providers, first responders, and all essential workers. Feeling grateful for their selflessness and humbled by the risks they take. In awe of their massive efforts, their sacrifices, and their dedication. Persisting in the face of long hours, horrible circumstances and emotional turmoil.
I can’t even find the right words to express gratitude for their selflessness.
Whenever I see stories about the healthcare workers right now, I become tearful. Seeing healthcare workers who are risking their own health and that of their families, the effort and stress they go through to try to keep their families safe and virus-free, the stress and emotional turmoil they are dealing with at work, and being overworked themselves, is heart-breaking. It is also awe-inspiring.
In many interviews I’ve seen recently, I’ve heard healthcare workers talk about their commitment to their work as a calling. They’ve mentioned feeling they’ve been called to their profession and naturally they will do whatever it takes, whatever is needed.
That sense of calling has stuck in my mind.
I was watching Nightline a few evenings ago. Healthcare providers were featured who were from parts of the country not as badly affected by the pandemic, and were uprooting their lives to travel to New York and lend their services.
One couple from Oklahoma answered a request for crisis travel nurses. They drove across the country to New York, not knowing what they’d be walking into. They were separated from each other, assigned to work overnight shifts in far corners of the city.
Speaking about why they made this choice, the couple acknowledged that finances were one initial motivator, but underneath they felt a deeper calling. They mentioned that it was also “spiritual”, and one of them said “I feel it’s our responsibility to step up.”
Another Intensive Care nurse drove to New York from Pennsylvania leaving his two small children behind. He even slept in his rented SUV until the city could provide free housing. He choked back tears thinking about being away from his kids. But he also wanted to pass along a lesson to his children, saying “If you have the ability, you have the responsibility.” He also spoke about a sense of calling saying “The three months that I’m gone, would have paled in comparison to how I would have felt if I didn’t come and help.”
These two stories stay with me. I am struck by their sense of calling, and their commitment to their calling.
Their words have stuck in my mind:
“I feel it’s our responsibility to step up.”
“If you have the ability, you have the responsibility.”
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about callings. Mission. Purpose. Gifts.
“The only gift is a portion of thyself.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
My Unique Purpose consists of my unique combination of gifts. My passions, interests, talents and desires all reflect my gifts. When I get quiet and connect to my intuition, when I connect to my Source; I know that anything I am drawn to — anything that makes my eyes light up when I talk about it, anything I’ve felt an internal desire to do or try or create or accomplish or work on — is one of my gifts.
And gifts are meant to be given.
Let me say that again.
Gifts are meant to be given.
It occurs to me that I am not meant to hold onto my gifts. Anything I feel drawn to, anything I feel inspired to do, anything I have a desire to do or am naturally good at (often we are not even aware of those), are part of my calling.
“If God gives you something you can do, why in God’s name wouldn’t you do it?”
I heard it said in the MKE course that
The meaning of life is to find our gifts. The purpose is to give them away.
If I have the ability, I have the responsibility.
This doesn’t just apply to doctors and nurses and other healthcare providers. This applies to me.
It is my belief that this applies to us all.
I wouldn’t be given a desire, a talent, an inspiration if it wasn’t a gift, and if that gift weren’t meant to be given. Maybe,
It’s my responsibility to step up.
Let me say that to myself again.
It’s my responsibility to step up.
What would stepping up look like for me? What would it look like to FULLY step into my purpose, to fully live my unique combination of gifts and to put them out there regularly?
What are your gifts? What is your unique combination of gifts, or your purpose?
What would stepping up look like for you?
What was that other quote that stuck in my mind and in my heart?
“The three months that I’m gone, would have paled in comparison to how I would have felt if I didn’t come and help.”
How would I feel if I DON’T give my gifts?
I would I feel if I DON’T even try?
How would I feel if I DON’T give away as much of my unique combinations of gifts as possible?
How would I feel if I die with my music still inside?
“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”
I’d feel like the man who knew he would regret it if he DIDN’T go and help in New York. I’d feel like he would feel if he DIDN’T give that message, or that gift, to his children.
Knowing what I know now… that my gifts are my purpose and that my purpose is to give my gifts —
I’d feel a wrench in my heart, a gash in my soul, a rip in my insides — knowing I didn’t give every effort to give my gifts.
My gifts are meant to be given.
I’d better get going, and get giving!
*Other great blogs I follow by other Master Keyers:
I love this post. This is beautiful and so pertinent. I love her conclusion, and I love the idea of going within and asking what I can offer at this time, because I am here for a purpose. Going to do that now…